ARTICLE OF TAKING LOVE FOR GRANTED

TRUE LOVE IS FOREVER True Love: Don't take love for granted... An Article by Mumtaz A. Piracha Love is basically an emotion just like anger, hatred, jealousy, and so on.  Like all emotions, love too has no timeline; it is not immortal either.  We take love to mean living together, sharing joy and sorrow, caring for  eachother's needs and desires, sharing hobbies, interests and likes and dislikes  for people, food, dresses, places, books, and so on. Love is a bond between two persons, man and woman, to care for eachother's needs and desires. As long as the needs and desires are fulfilled to the satisfaction of both the partners, the bond lasts.  Love is often mistaken to mean something that sticks a relationship like glue. That is probably not true, in general. We all know that marriages breakup at times after years of companionship for apparently no significant or irreconciliable cause. Why is it so? The desire to quit the relationship is hard to make; but people do make it. Does it happen when the emotion of love is no longer there? A person is not always in anger; a person is not always in hatred; a person is not always in jealousy. So, a person is not always in love. Simple, straight and easy to understand phenomenon. The basis of all relationships is mutual satisfaction. When both the partners are satisfied with each other's behaviour, manners, and support, the relationship remains intact. The moment a relationship deprives one or both of the partners of the satisfaction that he or she expects or desires from the other partner, cracks start appearing in the relationship. Criticism, nagging, temper tantrums, suspicion, diminishing trust, respect, understanding and avoidance of eachother's company or becoming incommunicado are the signs and symptoms of the erupting cracks. The longer the signs and symptoms persist without a solution, the deeper is the damage to the relationship. It is like the seepage of water in the very foundation of the relationship. It is like cancer, growing from a mole to become a molehill. It is like fresh water stagnated to become smelly. Many a time, we don't pay attention to the deteriorating relationship. We don't think it needs a repair. We don't like to talk about it. We presume it is just like that. We don't realize that the dissatisfaction of one or both partners is causing cracks in the relationship and that the relationship is bound to break-up or become irrelevant to our lives. We may be dragging our feet for the sake of longtime companionship, growing children, common friends and relations, community pressure and so on. Or maybe, one of the two partners can't sustain on its own for material wellbeing. A situation of compromise develops between the partners, willingly or unwillingly. But the problem persists and the problem is dissatisfaction. Ultimately, the dissatisfaction leads to the separation of the partners. The dissatisfaction continues to prick the heart and the mind when either of the partners or both are unable to reconcile and settle for the dimished satisfaction for larger life goals. Who is to be blamed, husband or wife? It is hard to say. The ratio of blame may vary for both; but children do play a key role in resolving the underlying causes and healing the wounds of their parents for the sake of keeping the family intact. Those children who take sides are most likely to end up with guilt feelings for the rest of their lives, should the relationship between their parents come to an end. It is the law of the Nature that the children normally love both parents, in most of the cases. They may tilt a bit towards one or the other at a given time, but generally feel strong emotions for both. When the life partners, who vowed to live together until death sets them apart, end up in a break-up of their relationship after years of living together, loving and caring, and enjoying life, both are eventually the losers. Both are likely to live with the live wire of 'years of betrayal' for the rest of their lives unless they are lucky to have new partners and fulfill their needs and desires. But then who knows when the second relationship may end up in dissatisfaction. The solution lies in removing the pricks and pangs of husband-wife relationship as the time passes; day in and day out. Corrections are needed every now and then. Dissatisfaction must never be allowed to persist for too long to cause irreparable damage to the relationship. Both must talk, communicate, accept shortcomings, admit mistakes, and work out solutions to their mutual satisfaction. The commonly-accepted solution of separation to cool off may be workable in some cases, but it is not a solution in real sense. Distance does'nt remove heartburn; you need medicine to cure it. Instead of opting for separation, it is always better to stay together and try to remove the causes of dissatisfaction. Living and working together to rejuvenate the relationship is the best medicine. Mumtaz Article sources:http://www.url.biz/Articles/Article-4233.html